Yes, it's the Samsung 970 Evo. It previously had Mojave, but I wanted a fresh install. The Installer Log provides nothing helpful, just that thread 0 has crashed or something.
I'm now contemplating on making a Mojave usb then upgrading, but that seems like a pain in the ass.
EDIT:
@CaseySJ
This is pretty big actually. I figured it out. Basically, you can't install with any USBInjectAll-076.kext or USBInjectAll-071.kext preset. Although it seems you can
upgrade just fine. I removed them and used the blue USB 3.0 ports on the back, and that seemed to let the installer proceed. Lots of the ports don't work, but I don't give a crap as long as I can install the damn thing.
I'm guessing there's something fundamentally wrong with the USB mapping. I'm attaching the EFI (minus serials) that finally let me select the disk and continue the installation.
I hope somebody smarter than me can figure out why this happened. It seems people have been upgrading a lot and not doing fresh installs so errors like this fall through the cracks.
EDIT 2:
It was the Commander Pro. You MUST disable the USB port it's on otherwise the installation things it's on reserved power. This was a waste of like 20 hours hahaha